The NBA All-Star Game is coming to Dallas-Fort Worth, and that means a lot of interlopers will be invading the area. Unlike the usual visitors, most of whom were driven there by a hurricane (not that there’s anything wrong with that), these NBA All-Star humans will want to eat out at restaurants. Even though I don’t live in Dallas anymore, I know a little about where to get some good food. A little.
This post was inspired by these restaurant suggestions from Dallas sports media members Gina Miller and Mark Stein, who are certainly entitled to their opinion. They might even understand you and your taste buds better, as a NBA All-Star person. But it’s alway good to get a second opinion, right?
Of their suggestions, the only three I’ve experienced firsthand are Miller’s Mi Cocina and Stein’s Snuffers and Fuel City. Gina Miller must like to drink, because there’s no other reason to go to Mi Cocina. Nothing wrong with throwing down some girlified cocktails, but be apprised that the food there isn’t that good, and there’s no free refills on soda. In 2010. In what is essentially a chain restaurant.
However, Snuffers is almost worth the trip to Dallas all by itself. If you go there, definitely get the cheese fries. Then absolutely get the fried pickles. Then, for the love of all that is holy, get a cheeseburger. The grease may kill you, but as you shuffle off you’ll be saying “great googly moogly” in a good way.
Fuel city is a gas station, but I implore you to let go of your racist attitudes towards gas station food while you’re visiting the land of Pointless Bigness and Wanna-Be LA-ism. Seriously, Fuel City has the best tacos I’ve ever eaten. Go there for the food, stay for the longhorn cattle.
It would probably be best to completely forget that Italian and Asian food exist while you’re in the DFW metroplex. I ate at a chinese buffet in Grafton, WI (pop. <15,000) on Monday that was better than any I experienced while in Dallas. There are some nice local italian places, but nothing that will knock your socks off. You’ll be in Dallas, what – three days? Trust me, you’ll want to stick to steakhouses, grills, and Mexican food places of all kinds. You won’t get steaks or enchiladas like this when you’re back in Cleveland, so take advantage of them now.
With that in mind, if you want the Mexican, I can show you the Mexican. The first place you’ll need to go is Joe T. Garcia’s in Fort Worth. I know it’s all the way in Fort Worth, but once you get there, you’ll discover two absolute truths: 1) Fort Worth is way way cooler than Dallas; 2) Joe T. Garcia’s is a great restaurant. Unless you go there on Sunday morning for the Brunch, Joe T’s offers exactly two dishes: enchiladas or a “family dinner.” It doesn’t matter which one you pick, but pick the enchiladas. Then order a Negro Modelo and lie back and experience the coolest meal you’ve had in a while. But be sure and bring cash, because they don’t take anything else.
If you’ve heard all these great things about Fort Worth and still don’t want to drive there, then grab a consolation prize at Tupinamba’s, especially if you’re looking for something to eat on Sunday at about noon. They have an amazing buffet for Sunday brunch, if you like food.
If you’re looking for a little adventure, head on over to the Chevron station at Park and Greenville in Dallas and order a Pastor Zinchronisaida. No, that’s not some obscure Mexican religious leader — it’s the most awesome quesadilla you’ve ever had the pleasure of putting in your face. Seriously. This guy agrees.
As for the rest of the food there, it’s all pretty much the same. I’ve heard good things about Bob’s Steak and Chop House, but at the end of the day a steak is just a steak. If you’re a foodie, then go where They tell you to go. I’ve given you three restaurants and two gas stations, what more do you want? You’ll probably be wanting to go to Ghostbar or Douche or Plarb or any of the other places where you can get table service and gawk at NBA stars. This is not my fault. Say hi to the Deathstar for me.
